Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
