the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
