I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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