I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize