Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
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