She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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