NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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