Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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