In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
