i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
