He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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