i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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