I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
