the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
