he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
