I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
