a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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