"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize