At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
