Pants 0. Shit 1.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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