this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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