If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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