why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Randomize
