Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
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