Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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