bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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