so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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