Texts From Last Night

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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.

  (719): View more from Colorado

  she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  are you serious?

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  (414): i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it. (719): she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her. (414): are you serious? http://tfl.nu/esul
  Replies (50) Good night (1297) Bad night (19423)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug

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  (650): i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug http://tfl.nu/0t6b
  Replies (25) Good night (3227) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead

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  (415): its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead http://tfl.nu/3qus
  Replies (45) Good night (889) Bad night (3493)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.

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  (512): stuffed animals make me feel really maternal. http://tfl.nu/jnap
  Replies (3) Good night (1083) Bad night (2282)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.

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  (917): Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub. http://tfl.nu/g66e
  Replies (9) Good night (4591) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.

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  (214): What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky. http://tfl.nu/b98l
  Replies (21) Good night (856) Bad night (3880)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?

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  (315): why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall? http://tfl.nu/qv4b
  Replies (9) Good night (1244) Bad night (4306)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'

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  (615): I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA' http://tfl.nu/bh1s
  Replies (3) Good night (1874) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."

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  (519): I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it." http://tfl.nu/vqit
  Replies (14) Good night (4619) Bad night (862)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.

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  (919): so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow... (1-919): I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that. http://tfl.nu/ee0c
  Replies (0) Good night (1879) Bad night (493)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.

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  (734): I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now. http://tfl.nu/9g1m
  Replies (2) Good night (630) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding

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  (416): Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding http://tfl.nu/gcol
  Replies (0) Good night (436) Bad night (259)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.

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  (512): The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount. http://tfl.nu/1v2k
  Replies (1) Good night (683) Bad night (289)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.

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  (613): I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season. http://tfl.nu/8rh9
  Replies (4) Good night (725) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.

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  (706): I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes. http://tfl.nu/ggf3
  Replies (1) Good night (232) Bad night (522)

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