Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight

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  (212): I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight http://tfl.nu/y0tm
  Replies (2) Good night (1220) Bad night (716)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.

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  (407): He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven. http://tfl.nu/duyw
  Replies (10) Good night (944) Bad night (4172)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?

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  (612): Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka? http://tfl.nu/htpr
  Replies (24) Good night (4637) Bad night (1680)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see

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  (973): i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see http://tfl.nu/sebi
  Replies (8) Good night (2949) Bad night (662)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it

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  (703): grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it http://tfl.nu/pj49
  Replies (28) Good night (824) Bad night (3954)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.

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  (248): Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy. http://tfl.nu/rzh3
  Replies (25) Good night (5322) Bad night (1112)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them

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  (201): I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them http://tfl.nu/szer
  Replies (14) Good night (2568) Bad night (6578)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.

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  (941): i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet. http://tfl.nu/jjy9
  Replies (13) Good night (3756) Bad night (1284)
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  (646): View more from New York

  HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.

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  (646): HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS. http://tfl.nu/gw0q
  Replies (21) Good night (3355) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..

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  (518): I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls.. http://tfl.nu/o5go
  Replies (3) Good night (639) Bad night (545)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control

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  (216): i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control http://tfl.nu/rhtt
  Replies (3) Good night (540) Bad night (774)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.

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  (904): That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring. http://tfl.nu/5dnd
  Replies (1) Good night (671) Bad night (358)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.

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  (512): You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you. http://tfl.nu/5imo
  Replies (1) Good night (923) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.

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  (707): Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard. http://tfl.nu/vbbc
  Replies (2) Good night (580) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT

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  (443): i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT http://tfl.nu/1m2q
  Replies (4) Good night (499) Bad night (312)

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