I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize