so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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