you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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