I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
