4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
