So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
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Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
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Enjoy the penises
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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