I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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