He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
In other news, I just burned my penis
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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