So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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