put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
19 Doctors Confess The Most Difficult Situation They’ve Ever Had To Face
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species