You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize