its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
