No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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