Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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