I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize