exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
