i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
