But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
