I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that