yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
