I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
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you didnt know i had herpes?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
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He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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