the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
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